Magog on the March (cutscene)
Overview A news broadcast which is basically Corporate Propaganda for the Magog Cartel, which gets shown in installments shown on monitors where those passing through them have to watch in order to proceed further, it has a Newscaster Slig reporting the news and stars some Glukkons from time to time. Transcripts Magog on the March #1 It is first shown as Abe arrives at FeeCo Depot, informing him what to do to get to Soulstorm Brewery: Newscaster Slig "The Magog on the March, news you need. Our Main Story: to prevent the Renegade Terrorist Mudokon known as Abe from possibly destroying Soulstorm Brewery, the main security gates can ONLY be opened by direct order from high ranking executives - General Dripik, Vice President Aslik and Director Phleg. if you have any further questions, please feel free to pull the lever to your right" The lever is right next to the screen, which kills those who pull it. Magog on the March #2 When Abe watches it from Slig Barracks, it relates to who is in charge of it: Newscaster Slig "The Magog on the March, news you can't abuse. General Dripik declares martial law" General Dripik "No mamby pamby Mudokon Meat-Puppet is gonna make me look like a fool! We'll have that traitor Abe in no time or my name ain't...uhh...uhh...uhh..." Off Camera Mudokon (quietly) "That's Dripik, Sir" General Dripik "Dripik! (facing the Off Camera Mudokon) I knew that, I...I did, I knew that" Newscaster Slig "Brought to you by Molluck's Mouth Lube - Say it, don't spray it!" Magog on the March #3 When Abe watches it from Bonewerkz: Newscaster Slig (air guitaring with his mike) "Yeow, bone production down, yea..wow, (stops air guitaring) The Magog on the March, news you can use. Director Phleg reports bone production down (holds a microphone to screen while posing) ow!" Director Phleg "It ain't my fault, it's that Abe guy!!! First RuptureFarms, now Necrum Mines! There ain't no bones anywhere! No bones, no Brew!!! I am TOTALLY screwed!!! My career is OVER!!! (splutters briefly) and it's all that blue bastard's FAULT!!!" Newscaster Slig " (not that bothered about what Director Phleg said) Yeah, yeah, blah, blah, blah... Brought to you by Scrab Cakes - mmm, mm, they'll cost ya an arm and a leg!" Magog on the March #4 When Abe watches it from FeeCo Depot: Newscaster Slig " (mimes plays golf with his mike) The Magog on the March, news you can't lose. Vice President Aslik address Mudokon workers" Vice President Aslik " (talking to someone off camera) Those STINKIN' slaves! (realizing he is on air) I..I mean, my fellow employees, Uncle Aslik's been takin' good care of ya right? I love alla'ya like you was my own, right? But if we don't catch this Abe guy, It's the BREW VATS for ALLA'YA!!! Now...what are you waitin' for? GET BACK TO WORK!!!" Newscaster Slig "Whoh, Brought to you by Soulstorm Brew - Our spew is your Brew" Magog on the March #5 When Abe finally gets to Soulstorm Brewery: Newscaster Slig "The Magog on the March, news for your blues. Warning, warning, Abe the Mudokon Terrorist has infiltrated Soulstorm Brewery. Glukkon department heads explode! Oh, the horror! Even though Brew production has plummeted, Mudokon workers are disappearin' left and right and the toilets are backin' up all over the place, top management says that everything is GONNA BE FINE! Uh-huh (!)...I'm outta here (he chucks mike away and hops off the platform)" He is also featured in the Good Ending on Abe's Exoddus informing that Abe is responsible for the Soulstorm Brew "atrocity", the Magog on the March was intended to be included in Munch's Oddysee, but was cut from the final product, instead replaced with the "Daily Deception" newspaper cutscenes. Category:Cutscenes Category:Abe's Exoddus Category:Abe's Exoddus Cutscenes Category:Abe's Exoddus Cutscene Transcripts